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My Rat Is A Cross Dressing Opossum~ Or, Can I Get A Gun To Match My Shoes!~

This weekend was beautiful one of those perfect, mid-western spring days. The skies were baby blue with nary a cloud to be seen. The birds were singing. The winds were just a gentle breeze, and the trees were all budding lime green with a sprinkling of leaves waving as I passed by. The air held a slight chill so I had to wear my orange coat unzipped, I never broke a sweat.

Uriah ran up to me panting. He had his worried face on. His eyes bulging out as he tried to walk as close to me as possible, without actually jumping into my arms.

“Come on Uriah!  What’s wrong with you?” I patted him on his head and he paced then leaned into me.

I stood up and looked around not yet getting what the problem was. Then I heard it. The call of the, Warm-Weathered-Mid-Western-Gun-Owner and  my main reason for wearing a bright orange stylish coat all-year-round.  Avoidance of bullets! Add in the fact that I could be seen from miles off. Unless they think that deer, coyote and raccoons shop at Fleet and Farm, I should be safe.

The sound of a gun being fired caught my attention, along with the immediate high pitch ‘Peeeyuuu!” sound traveling behind it.  The bullet must have ricocheted off something then headed in my direction.

Sort of ruined that safe feeling of wearing my orange coat!

I continued on with Uriah around the back path, enjoying the warmer spring air, just a little more leery.

Yesterday when we took the same walk I saw one of my neighbors, standing in the farmer’s air field, at the back of the path. He and his two young boys were digging a hole. When I came close we exchanged pleasantries. Then he explained the farmer gave him permission to shoot the chipmunks. He then told me that the coyotes hunt the chipmunks and dig holes making it unsafe for the farmer to land his planes. Okay..

 Then he added. “You shouldn’t be walking around without a gun!” He nodded looking around.   “There are Cougars in Illinois that sleep in the trees! Just like in California and they will jump out at you. Or grab little kids, like my boys here,” He pointed to his sons and mimicked biting at the kids, “and then they’ll drag ‘em off” He hesitated for effect then added. “And there are Wolves here now. I know a hunter who saw their tracks just on the other side of town.” Hand on hips, he gave me a few seconds for that to sink in then he continued.  “And a Wolf pack will hunt you down if you’re walking alone!”  He pointed to the gun slung over his boys shoulder. “That’s why you should never walk around here without a gun.”

 I responded back.  “Wolves eat rodents! Rats, mice, rabbits, chipmunks… not people!’

“They will if they get hungry enough!”

There are certain points during conversations where I think of Lucy and Charlie Brown, the Peanuts Cartoon characters. This was one of those times.

 

Lucy had told Charlie Brown, the reason a Palm tree is called a Palm tree is because you can get your entire palm around it. Charlie Brown reacts by clutching his stomach in pain.

 

I know how he felt…

To be truthful he had me a little nervous. I remembered how Uriah was frightened a couple of times at night, and I mentioned that. (see  link #3 below)

“Yeah!  Probably a Cougar!”  This guy is good. He will nod yes, when he wants you to say yes. And shake his head adamantly when he wants the negative reaction. Right now he was nodding and looping his thumbs in his belt loops. ”Yeah! Cougars!”

Okay I have to stop here. I tried to call the county to ask them about this. But no one called me back.  Gee! I wonder why…

A couple of Cougars were sited a year or two ago and they were shot. Illinois doesn’t have cougars on the endangered species list because they are so few. Cougars were exterminated in Illinois before 1870.

As for Wolves, according to ‘Defenders of Wildlife’ site (see link #1 below) Wolves; “were killed in most areas of the United States by the mid 1930s”

The difference being, Wolves are on the endangered species list.  (See the link #2, below)

Back to my walk: Uriah was bored he wanted to keep walking he didn’t want to stand around and talk. He kept glancing at the guns, then looking away.

I had to ask this question.” How do you know that a coyote was digging those holes? Could’ve have been anything!”

He answered with a wave of his hand. “Well there are coyote tracks all over the dirt. They are really good diggers.”

“I was just wondering, because we have a lot of holes made by Muskrats.” I pointed behind me, about fifty feet away there was a visible mound of rocks.

“Muskrats? Huh!”  

After that answer I was wondering if he knew what a Muskrat was.

“We also have a couple of irritating rats near the outside kennel that dig a lot!”

“Rats! You sure it’s not a opossum?” He gave me that I don’t believe you look.

“No! It’s a rat. A nice fat county Rat!” I held my hands about half a foot apart.

“Could be a raccoon.” He mumbled.

“Coon! No it’s a rat!”

 He kept shaking his head, as if I would change my mind and agree it was something else.

“It’s a rat! I have a picture of it. Unless it was a opossum, and it dressed up like a rat!”

Luckily his phone rang and his wife summoned him to dinner.  Or he was bringing it with him. I don’t know!  I didn’t look at what happened to the chipmunks they had shot.

When I got back in the house, I told Michael we needed a gun to fend off Cougars and Wolves. He wanted to know what I was drinking on my walk…

#1: Information on grey wolf:

http://www.defenders.org/wildlife_and_habitat/wildlife/wolf,_gray.php

#2: Endangered species list:

http://ecos.fws.gov/speciesProfile/profile/speciesProfile.action?spcode=A00D

http://ecos.fws.gov/tess_public/pub/stateListingAndOccurrenceIndividual.jsp?state=IL

#3:

http://gerardinebaugh.wordpress.com/2010/03/15/something-was-in-the-fogor-take-bets-on-who-pees-first/

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55 Words For Friday~ Or, Don’t Drop Your Participles On My Tulips!~

Friday Flash 55..

I followed the 55 word story theme from this Blog:

http://jingleyanqiu.wordpress.com/2010/04/16/55-rain-is-17/

To this Blog:

http://www.waystationone.com/2010/04/55-traveling-circus-of-idiots.html

To this Blog:

http://g-man-mrknowitall.blogspot.com/2010/04/friday-flash-55_15.html

I could keep going.  If I do you will never get to

my 55 words… On my Blog:-)

The warm air turned cold.
I shivered.
The gate squeaked,
then quietly clicked shut.
I pressed deeper into the shadows
and held my breath,
hoping
it would leave.  
It dragged its damaged foot across the floor.
It knew where I was hiding
and stopped directly in front of me.
I barely had time
to scream!
 
Tulips are blooming, their color is so vibrant. Flowers for Friday  

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If I Were Kate Gosselin…~Or, Poem for Thursdays Jingles Poetry Rally!~

I am not Kate Gosselin

I don’t have eight kids

Really! I don’t!  Believe me, I looked!

My divorce was never on the internet

Or television, or in the tabloids

Could have been…

At one point I did a walk-on for Jerry Springer

I was working, installing a sign 

Across the street from where they were taping

Up on a building, standing on a ladder..

They asked me to be the jealous girlfriend

Does that count?

If I was Kate Gosselin

I would have a reality show

Dance across the screen

And hit the talk shows…

Wait!

I’m still looking for those eight kids

They have to be around here somewhere!

Uriah told me
To stop being silly and
Take his picture please

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Strolling Through The Grass and Mud While Listening To The Birds!~ Or-Did You See Where That Mouse Went?~

 

The past couple of weeks we went from freezing your butt off,   to help me I’m melting usually, all in one day.

Sunday morning, when I stepped outside I was surprised by the warm air and hazy grey skies heavy with moisture.  Saturday night the weatherman had announced. “It would be cold in the morning and a warm-up was coming in the early afternoon.” I was glad he got it wrong.   It was gorgeous!

It was only eight o’clock in the morning.  The warm air and a barrage of happy birds flitting from tree to tree helped Uriah talk me into taking a walk out back.

The path had drained off, but that downed tree still lay across my path. I followed Uriah as he walked around it and closer towards the fence.

Along the northern side of the path, the older Blog Willows grew, with their dark brown tangled tops reached upward. Maybe in few days, when I can take the tractor out, I will be able to push that tree out of the way… Even as that thought skimmed by, I knew from experience, that once the ground was able to hold the weight of the tractor, those roots will be stuck in the ground like cement.

I carefully stepped over the exposed roots and tangled dried grass that held a death grip on the base of the tree.  I could see a hole underneath exposing roots and rich black dirt.  Pieces of moss clung to the roots.

I mumbled out loud. “There may be an animal’s den in that hole!”   

I watched as Uriah stuck his nose close to the hole then stepped back quickly.   Using his normal ten second thought process, he caught a different scent and raced ahead of me. I glanced back at the tree and promptly followed Uriah’s lead.

By the time I caught up to Uriah.  He was circling an evergreen. The fur on his back was straight up.  He was kicking dirt out behind him as he scrapped at the ground. From the corner of my eye I saw something move across the empty field.  I couldn’t make out what it was, possibly a deer.   The large animal disappeared quickly into a grove of Oak trees. Uriah made a move to chase, but first he looked at me. Now it’s not like Uriah to listen, or ask permission. He knew he would be in trouble if he chased after the animal.  Most days he didn’t care. Today, he hesitated. Hmmm!   Uriah knew that whatever that was would hurt him and he just wanted me to tell him no.  Which I did!  Saving face, Uriah happily pranced back to my side.  

By the time I circled the path I was heading west and home.  Uriah took off in the trees to my right. He never got out of my sight. He even stopped and waited while I watched a flock of starlings in the trees above me. They fanned out then regrouped in a wave of wings and chattering. As soon as they settled in the tops of the trees one bird would rise up and the rest followed in a massive flow of feathers. Red Winged Blackbirds, Robins, Doves, Sparrows, Cardinals, sang around and above me. The noise level was incredibly loud. 

The trees that hadn’t budded last week were budding green this week.  The grass was growing at odd heights. I sidestepped a fairy circle and headed to the dog kennel.

Uriah panted as he ran up. He stepped into the kennel for water and a mouth full of his kibble.  Which I was glad to see wasn’t touched by the birds, or that rat.  

Suddenly! Everything fell silent!  I checked the skies for signs of the Hawk.  I couldn’t hear the Hawk’s high pitch screech. I was positive a predator had to be nearby!  All the birds stopped talking…    Just as quickly, they started up again.  The bird’s voices rose once more to a manic pitch and the wave of sound rolled over me.

I watched as Uriah crunched his biscuits. He nosed around in the grass for every last morsel. My stomach growled!  Time for my own breakfast …

I wanted you guys to see; Kenshin and Sano are hot on case of, “The Mice in the Garage!” Will they catch them, or not stay tune!
Did you see where that mouse went?
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Sanosuke Mighty Hunter~ Or, Run! Dead Mouse On The Loose!~

Sanosuke caught a second mouse. I grabbed the camera, but the lighting is very dark. Sorry! 

What you didn’t see, was when I tried to take it from him. When I finally got the courage to try and take it away, Sano flipped the mouse right at me.

The mouse theme has ended, for a while at least! Unless I find one waiting for me in my bed..

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Chainsaws, Tractors, Or Woodpeckers! So Hard To Choose!~

The past few days the weather has been up and down, sideways and in circles.

 Last night we had pouring rain, thunder and dangerous lightening.  During the first part of that storm I was outside, walking as close to the house as I could get, while I tried to encourage Uriah to do his business in a hurry. Nothing hurries Uriah. I stood back and watched the dark sky light up emphasizing the jagged edges of the high Cumulonimbus clouds. A rolling rumble vibrated underneath my feet and still Uriah sniffed at the edge of the Blue Spruce, unperturbed. It was only when I told him to get in the house that he started to whine. He hates thunderstorms, but Uriah’s idea of safety during a storm is to stand out in the open and stare up into the electrified sky.

On Sunday, when the path was still a path, severe winds blew over a tree.   Fortunately I wasn’t out there when it happened. I never made it though the back yard, even attempting to make my way to the back path was impossible. The winds were irritatingly loud!  I couldn’t see past my hair, no matter how hard I tried, and at one point I thought I saw Miss Gulch pedaling over head, followed closely by that Pheasant, and That Rat. With each step I fought to move forward.  I could have tied a rope to Uriah and flew him like a kite.  Alright, a fat, pudgy unhappy kite…

Today the path is underwater and the air is so heavy I was feeling out of sorts, dizzy, sneezing, and hard to breathe I am moving very, very slow. On the bright side the toads are croaking loudly and the mosquitoes are out and biting.  Hmmm!

Back to the tree!  In order for me to remove that tree I will need to use the tractor, and ‘she’ is still asleep covered in blankets in the barn. 

I stood back and paced out the distance from the beginning of the path to the downed tree, sixty steps. Not good! Last year we had a tree fall over and it was only a fraction of the distance, and a forth the size. Taking the tractor in that area would set me up for disaster with all that soft wet mud under the large wheels. If I stood in the mud I would sink in. If I add a tractor with spinning wheels and an idiot driving (me) … Well, the tractor will sink deep in the mud, and at that point I will need to call someone in to pull it out.

Still I stood there and thought about it…

If I used the tractor I will need a very long chain that I can connect to the tree, and the tractor. All the while crossing my fingers, that both will hold  on the first attempt.  They never do! One side or both will slip off and have to be reconnected, while I’m left standing in the thick black, oozing mud.

I considered leaving the tree and cutting a path around it..hmmm! I have a chain saw, sort of.  Michael hid it somewhere,  so that idea  might not work.

Today isn’t the day to work out the technicalities, too much water and a lack of diesel, and a hidden chainsaw.

Last resort… Woodpeckers!  Eventually they would pound holes in that tree allowing it to fall apart. I’m voting for the birds.

 In the meantime, Uriah walked around the tree…

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Sanosuke’s First Bunny Rabbit! ~

Sanosuke’s first bunny rabbit! A picture is worth a thousand words!

Four

             pictures

                              are

                                     priceless.

 

 

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Look Up! Spring Is Putting On A Fashion Show~~

      Yesterday and this morning I took my walk looking up. The trees are just starting to bud. And the flowers are just beginning to show their colors.

The ground is littered with dried left over leaves, brittle and grayish brown, crunching under foot. Even as the grass makes an attempt to turn green, as the moss pulls on its most brilliant lime  green coat  of the season. The main show is taking place above ground; branches are turning colors as spring moves through them. Don’t miss the show!

“In the spring I have counted one hundred and thirty-six different kinds of weather inside of four and twenty hours.” ~Mark Twain

Within the past two hours, I have seen heavy fog, thick dark grey clouds, and a bright blue sky, that shifted to a pale whitish-blue.

A bellowing cloud of smoke passed through my house as the farmer burned off the dried grass around the creek bed. The thick heavy smoke made it a little uncomfortable to breathe. So Uriah and I headed off to the mail box and I took pictures of the blooming, Pussy Willow as Uriah disappeared to wade in the pond.

Uriah  came back out of the cold  pond and  pulled his fat tummy across the grass, this is his way of toweling himself off…

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Thinking Out Loud~

 

Why is it

              when the air cools

                                          I can feel the past,

                                                                     I shiver and sigh…

The sun rose slowly, over a humid, cool and very clear moment. The air was still. I watched as two dozen Robins pacing out the yard. I was an interloper into their world, for this moment, they let me stay.

I gripped my hot coffee cup, held it close and stared out over the empty field. The sun was hidden behind the clouds that sat on the horizon, I looked up the sky was shifting to a sleepy blue above me, without a slip of a cloud.

This time of day holds loosely to a cool silence.  Where nature is kind and allows us to wake up slowly as nocturnal animals drift off to sleep.

I use to walk out in this quiet, barefoot. I would step easily around and over rocks and spiders. It is the spiders that are awake; they weave and repair their webs all night catching insects unawares in the darkness. Now those webs shimmer with icy dewdrops and I stay on the deck.

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What A Difference A Day Makes!~ Or, Uriah Took A Walkabout!~

This morning the snow was gone. Not totally! There are still patches sitting in the shadows, under a bush or tree, and along the shaded area on the deck. For the most part, the snow melted as the warmer air and sunshine moved in.

Barely a breeze this morning, I stepped outside ready for my morning walk. I called to Uriah and headed along the path. Birds were fluttering from tree to tree, and screaming at my intrusion into their lives. How dare I!

This morning my walk was uneventful, or was it? Did I miss the rodents scurrying under the evergreens? Or the red-winged black birds flying over head then stopping to watch me as they perched on the highest point of the tallest tree..

I saw them all. A powdery blue sky, void of clouds, crowned above me as the beautiful green scent of spring drifted along my walking path. I was very relaxed and at peace with the day.

Uriah ran up to me, wagged his tail and ran to the tree line. He gave me a backwards glance and disappeared. I wasn’t concerned until I was back at the house, then I wondered where he was. I whistled! I called out! I walked next to the Bog Willows and tried to peek inside. I couldn’t find Uriah anywhere. I headed towards the barn and kept walking towards the north until I hit the empty field. Carefully maneuvering myself over the thick brown, flatten grass; I glanced to the east taking in the rolling waves of black dirt, empty of movement. I had thought, just maybe, Uriah was taking a stroll in the field looking for something repugnant to roll in. He wasn’t there…

I walked back south, turned and headed once more to path towards the east. I walked to the far back.  Carefully I avoided holes and barbed wire and stared along the farmer’s air field, first towards the red barn, then to the grove of trees, south.  

By this time anger was being replaced by fear. The farmer is known for shooting dogs.

I started to walk back towards the house.

 Suddenly, Uriah appeared, his tongue hanging out; tired he flopped at my feet and looked up as if he wanted me to give him a few minutes to recover from his run.

“Where did you go?”  I rubbed his face checking his fur for animal dung.

Uriah hung his head and stared at the ground.

With a heavy sigh, I started walking back to the house. A Blue Jay appeared and screamed at us. Uriah jumped up and walked along side me…